Oh Punk

It stink like the hell...

I hate opening posts with side notes, but this was just too funny to ignore. So in much need of a picture for this article, I typed in "stink" into Google Images. Sure enough this picture had to come up in the top 10.

Pretty funny, especially considering every new movie that Ice Cube has made -- SUCKS! "Are we there yet?" I'm not even going to get into XXX2, and the rest. It looks like we have another LL Cool J on our hands.

On to more serious things. Today's topic of note: BODY ODOR.

I was shopping this weekend at a relatively upscale furniture store. Up until now, the people that I had encountered at these sort of places have been nothing but very attractive, slim women dressed in black. "What this rug costs $6,000? No problem. Here's my Visa..."

But... Saturday was entirely different. No girls in sight, no big deal -- slim chance of me being suckered into buying something. The lad working the floor seemed to be pleasant -- that was until I stepped within 10 feet of him! Ugh!

Is there anything worse than being slammed by an invisbile wall of sweaty BO? You know that feeling when your eyes bulge out, and you quickly inhale your last gasp of air before having to see how long you can go for without breathing (3:57 seconds incase you were wondering, I think I now have brain damage).

Normally, I would've turned around an ran for the door, but there was this table that I really wanted, and of course the one on display was the very last one. How ideal? I had no choice but to talk to him.

Any minute some smart couple with gas masks could burst through the front of the store trying to purchase my table. F-that, and f-them. So manned up I did.

"Hey, how's it going? I'd like to purchase..."

As I stood there trying to speak, while my brain instinctively kept spamming me with "Breathe through your mouth! Breathe through your mouth!" messages, I found that I had just answered my own question.

There was something worse than just plain B.O. What could it possibly be?

Body Odor coupled with cheap cologne! Breathing through my mouth didn't help either. It was so bad, I could taste it -- yuck!

It was honestly worse than standing in the middle of the Boston Fish Market at the end of the day when they dumped all the fish guts, chum, and other rotting seafood waste onto the street and plowed them into the ocean. Just imagine - disgusting!

The things you'll do for a table.

On a brighter note as much as I hate AXE Bodyspray, their commericials are just awesome. I'd never wear that crap, because the last thing I really need is a bunch of trailer park girls telling me how great I smell...

There are 3 comments:



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