Oh Punk

True Friends

A friend of mine very recently got himself into a crazy situation, and I had to bail him from the slammer.

Remind me to dress up well the next time that I head down to pick up a friend from jail on the weekend! All the women who worked there (including the cops, who would have thought?) were smoking hot! Woah!

But seriously... That incident got me thinking: What if that was me in the slammer? Who would I call? Would anyone be there for me? Would I be able to use an open toilet? (yes!!)

It's good to know that I also have friends who will have my back no matter what! For those of you with no friends or fake costmetic friends -- I feel deeply sorry for you, you live a sad life.

Speaking of being rescued, I just had a way random thought. You know what was the crappiest GI JOE toy that you could ever get?

The fucking MEDIC!

Really? If you're a kid imagining that you are fighting the evil forces of Cobra, do you really want to have be "Lifeline" the first-aid carrying fairy? He even came with a handgun, but I'm pretty sure his ass had a terrible shot.

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