Oh Punk

Slump Busting

Earlier in the year I assembled a corporate softball team. Yesterday marked the end of our inaugural season. How'd we do?

We won one game all season!

Yup, one measley game. Our final record was 1 win, 17 losses. But worry not, we're still in it to win it! Apparently EVERYONE makes playoffs, and guess who we play first? The one team we actually played very well against.

Oh snap! Can you imagine -- the number one team getting taken out first round by us? A bunch of fucking misfits? Yes ladies and gentlemen, this is quite possible.

Thanks to that good old NHL mentality of "Don't worry about doing well during the regular season, just make it to the playoffs, and we've got a chance..." we actually may take it all in our first time around. Wouldn't that be impressive?

Now it's just a matter of getting out of our season long slump. And since I put the team together, I'm listed as the captain. It's my responsibility to do something!

What would former Chicago Cub's First Baseman Mark Grace do if he was in a slump? Oh wait: He'd Slump Bust! Slump Busting is defined as follows:

"Slumpbuster" is a term coined by former MLB player Mark Grace. It was derived by Grace to describe a certain type of woman who he believes helped him overcome on-field struggles. For example, when Grace would find himself in a hitting slump he would seek out "the gnarliest, ugliest chick" he could find and attempt to bed her. If he was successful, the next day he was sure to get a hit, busting him out of his slump, hence the phrase.
I guess that's my mission for this week. Ugh, looks like I will be taking it for the team. Gross! I'm so doing this at the Playboy mansion., because I couldn't deal with anything less than this.

Below: Maybe this is why we're losing? Check out our gay-ass uniforms! We work for an IT company, get it? We're the "MEGABYTES" -- it's a circuit board! See? See? Yeah, I know, it's fucking gay -- but what did you expect? I designed these shirts while my ass was drunk at 3:00am


There are 8 comments:

At 10:11 PM, Anonymous Chin said...

you're playing MIG. i love/hate playing that team... we have an excibition game against them on monday i can't/can wait!

At 12:37 AM, Anonymous Shaun said...

Lemme guess, you hate playing them because they can hit in the gaps, and field the ball as if they were reading a textbook on baseball?

And you love playing them.. because.. oh.. uhh.. oh.. that HOT brown girl?

At 9:59 AM, Anonymous Blondie said...

Well, even if you only won one game all season, you put "won" and "one" in the same sentence and managed to keep track of which one was which. That's not an easy feat.

At 5:27 PM, Anonymous Armando said...

I like your blog!! Is very nice!! Congratulations!! ( Armando - Portugal)!!

At 10:27 PM, Anonymous Shaun said...

Thanks man!

At 12:08 AM, Anonymous Shaun said...

Blondie: You know what, you're right: Using "won" and "one" in a single sentence is indeed a difficult task, BUT, not as complicated as using won, one, and Juan in a sentence.

Example: Juan won one free wonton...

Still impressed?

At 9:39 AM, Anonymous Blondie said...

HA, Well, amused.

At 1:10 AM, Anonymous Shaun said...

I'll take that. It's better than nothing :)


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