Oh Punk

How to Smuggle a Camera into a Concert...

With even ultra ghetto digital cameras capable of recording audio and video these days, concert promoters are on red alert for digital bootleggers.

Almost every event that I've been to in the last little bit has had a strong NO CAMERA policy. Chappelle's security detail even threatened to revoke your ticket if you were caught with a camera during his recent tour.

With pat downs, spot checks and mandatory camera check-ins -- it's almost impossible to sneak cameras into some venues! Last night's Justin Timberlake concert was not much different, so I came up with this smuggling strategy:


1. Obtain a stylish digital camera (note: will also work with non-stylish cameras)


2. Wrap camera in several paper towels. The paper will absorb any clangy sounds when the package is shook.


3. Insert wrapped camera into ziplock bag.


4. Deposit bag into circular cardboard trinket box (available at Ikea)



5. Wrap box with bright gay-ass dollar store wrapping paper.


6. Place wrapped box in equally gay / gaudy dollar stor gift bag.


7. For authenticity, add some generic name to the gift tag. If security asks, just say it's a gift for your girlfriend. What? Are they going to make you unwrap a present? That's fucking cold -- and it just ain't gonna happen. "Happy Birthday Andrea!"

Voila!

That's how you smuggle a camera into a concert in these days of anti-digital bootlegging. This is also why security guards get paid $9.00 an hour and I don't.

Stay tuned for more how-to ideas! In the meanwhile, send me your requests.

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There are 90 comments:



At 10:54 PM, Anonymous Rubes said...

/rant on

OMG ok now why would you go to that length to bring a camera into a concert venue, next time don't pretend to be going with a girl or meeting up with a girl just bring a girl with you. Case and point have her put the camera in her bag and walk right through. Have you not noticed that super huge gigantic bags are in and can hide everything and anything in them. Stupid security at these venues just scans the tops of your bags and do not go through them all the way to the bottom. Man just have your girl throw a couple of pads and tampons in there so that ensures that the security guard (most likely a male) will be too embarrased to even touch anything in there.

/ rant off

 
At 10:58 PM, Anonymous Rubes said...

Opps forgot one thing WHY THE EFF ARE YOU GOING TO A JT CONCERT? There I can now rest easy.

LOL oh yeah "how was it by the way?"

 
At 11:12 PM, Anonymous Shaun said...

Laugh! You know what -- because of your rant, I'm uploading the video.

PS. The JT concert was wicked. There, I said it. I don't care!

 
At 11:17 PM, Anonymous e-karl said...

Dude's a closet to 40 whore... man.. this is the same guy who went to an NSync concert too. He says its to see hot women at the venue, but really, he is all about Justin...

Come on Shaun... we have all seen the posters at your Desk... Others may be "Achin' for Aiken" (Clay Aiken that is), but you can't put "The Brake On Timberlake".

 
At 11:21 PM, Anonymous Shaun said...

Oh Punk!

My ex *made* me go to Nsync. But.. I'll give props to JT. Wait till you see the DAMN GIRL video I post..

 
At 11:52 PM, Anonymous Blondie said...

Shaun's always "going with a girl" or "meeting up with a girl"

Note how few pictures there are of him actually WITH girls.....

 
At 8:42 AM, Anonymous Shaun said...

... laugh, don' t post my personal life on my blog! Hey wait, don't I have a picture with you somewhere?

 
At 4:41 PM, Anonymous Tanya said...

Shaun who is Andrea!!!? huh we have to talk ok.. hehe jk.. Smart move u sneaky bastard. Next time put some drugs in there and make money while at the concert. (now thats smart)

 
At 5:54 PM, Anonymous Shaun said...

LOL! Andrea = random name! *smirk*

As for drugs? Don't you know.. drugs, drugs, drugs... some are good.. some are bad... drugs, drugs, drugs... tell your mom and your dad!

hahaha

I'm so funny.

 
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